Keith Geisler in loving memory...
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Words from Dad

To my son Keith.

 

The most difficult thing as a parent in raising our children is the constant fear of losing them to some tragedy. From the day they are born until the day we are gone it is always not far in our thoughts. My greatest fear now realized I must find a way to survive something worse than my own death. My beautiful wonderful boy is gone and I must and will reflect on what went wrong. No one should outlive their own children. It is not the natural way of life. But I must and will survive for my remaining sons, wife and family. But they will never get more than they have from me now as Keith will always have his part of me.

 

How can one survive with so much loss so much pain? The answer is all around me. My friends, my family, Keith’s friends; we are overwhelmed with your support and it makes us strong. People say to be strong and that one day I will move on and that is my greatest fear. I do not want to lose the feelings I have for my son and want them as strong as they are today until the day I die when I will share my love with him once more. 

 

A prouder father I could not be. Keith, you never failed me but you always exceed my expectations. You were kind to all you met and respectful. You never said no to me that I can remember. When you saw that I was tired and needed company on a drive you always came along. Reluctant at times but you put my needs first. You stood by my side and as times were tough for me I never had to ask you to sacrifice, you were always ready to lead. We are not born as fathers; it is our children that show us the way, our parents. Keith made me a better father to all my sons by showing me tolerance of others and to respect their differences.

 

You were a better student then I ever was and I always knew your potential had no limits. It was exciting to listen to you talk about your History class as you explained only as you could what you learned each day and brought the facts you had remembered to life in such great detail. You inspired me.

 

It has been said in our generation that our children are more likely to be our friends, sometimes our best friends. Well for me this was true. It was hard for me to scold him and it did not come often but I know the way he looked at me he accepted that what I did for him as what was always in his best interest and not mine. We could not have had a closer bond as our union was on several levels. I invited my boys each in their moment to spend time with me. I looked forward to watching them transition from boy to man.

 

I have found that you can never tell your children enough that you love them because that is the first and last words they should hear. You will never know when the last will be so think to yourself when was the last time you really told them you loved them? Keith had a way to see people and when they needed his love and attention. I saw it in the way he held them with such a gentle touch. He was always ready to give even when he was the one in need.

 

To Keith’s Friends. He loved you all. I know this is true by how well he spoke of you always. Many of you I never met but Keith in his own descriptive way helped me to get to know you all. Many of you were childhood friends since kindergarten and you were look on by him as his brothers. You were there then and are here now and that is what matters. Most of you were aware of the difficulties Keith was going through and I know many of you were there for him day and night. None of you let him down. All of you gave him the support he needed. Better friends he could not have. Do not think you could have done anything more than you did. Look to others that need your help now and take them under your wing and nurture them through the difficult times as only a friend can do.

 

To Keith’s Brother Kevin. A better brother he could not have. I watched you two become so close. A closeness I always wished was present with my siblings. You let him know if there was anything at all he could come to you and he did and you did not fail him. You provided your immediate support in whatever path he chose. You were always available to him and I know your love for him was strong. A brothers bond cannot be broken even in passing.

 

To his Grandparents. Keith like any teenager began to move away from us both. But he never turned down an opportunity to spend time with you. He always left your home  with stories of the fun he had. You were always there to make things special for him and he and I will never forget your devotion.

 

I thought I knew the meaning of love, but I was not even close. Now that Keith is gone I can see to what depths my love for you is inside of me. I have no guilt but it is never possible for someone to leave you without having some regrets. There is always one more thing you think you could have done. I will not dwell on this because I know Keith would not want this. He would want me to continue to see him as I saw him before he left as his loving son.

   

In the end Keith chose his own destiny. He felt life for him was unbearable and what lay ahead had more promise. I know in time he would have found his way and place in this life but time ran out. Please all of you do not take this path. Live a long life with your loved ones. Loved ones now close to you and ones you have still not met. Sometimes it is easier to give up on life, realize this will bring great torment to your loved ones. Our life is full of ups and downs. Keep the good times close and leave the bad times behind.

 

Keith you will never be lost with us. You were in this world only for a short time of your expected time here. But the time you were here has given me so many cherished memories I feel you close to me now and will forever more. When the time comes we will never be apart again. We will all be together until eternity. This is the promise of the universe that nothing ever really dies. Nothing is wasted. Nothing is lost. I was honored to have you for my son and promise to honor your memory and do the best I can for my fellow man. May God now cherish you as I have.

 

I love you Keith.


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